My Top 5 Movies that Maddy Almost Walked out of in 2009 Hurts

I say almost walked out of because I have actually never walked out of a movie. I am much too passive aggressive and would rather suffer in silence until the credits roll, then bitch about the film very loudly as I go past the people waiting to see it. Yes I am that person.

To be honest not many movies floated my cinematic boat this year. Loved Where the Wild Things Are, Genova, Inglorius Basterds. Away We Go was sweet and The Boys are Back had me blubbering within the first 5 minutes which I take as a win because at least it made me feel something other than knuckle-cracking boredom. But I saw a lot of movies this year and unfortunately enjoyed very few. I’m not trying to be difficult. I wanted to enjoy them ever so much. Matt thinks that’s the problem – I expect too much so am always disappointed and then judge more harshly. Luckily thanks to his working at a cinema, I didn’t waste any of my moolah on said crappy films.

So here we go Top 5 movies Maddy almost walked out of in 2009

5. Let the Right One In

This has less to do with it being a bad movie and more to do with me being a little bitch. It was actually kind of cool, but I had my hand over my eyes for a good part of it because I’m a total wuss when it comes to things of the scary nature. Matt had said it would be like "an arty Swedish Twilight." This was untrue. So very untrue. It was way less brooding-omg-i-want-to-eat-you-and-love-you-at-the-same-time-i'm-so-torn and much more freaky as all hell. So if you're into that kind of thing, go see it.

4. (500) Days of Summer
I saw what this movie was trying to do. I appreciated what this movie was trying to do. But god I didn't buy it. It wanted to be Annie Hall with prettier people and text messaging but it had no soul. I didn't like any of the characters and I found the little attempts at interesting filmmaking (the musical sequence and the black and white bit) completely forced. With it being billed as the Indie rom-com of the year, I kinda of knew I would be let down. I was just surprised at how completely and utterly disappointed I was. Also is it just me or does Miss Indie aka Zoey Deschanel only have one facial expression - the I'm-so-quirky-but-you-could-never-guess-what-I'm-thinking-because-it's-very-deep-but-also-random glazed stare. She is ever so beautiful though, I'll give her that.

3. Sherlock Holmes
Gah. Saw this on the weekend and it was downright boooooring. Another one I was looking forward to because Robert Downie Jnr is my old guy boyfriend (Matt and I have allowed each other one old person and one young person to sleep with guilt free. RDJ is my old guy one and John Krasinski is my young one, fyi) and also Guy Ritchie seemed like he would be perfect for this film. But it wasn't gritty, edgy, funny or remotely interesting. It really dragged and every plot turn was obvious and yet ridiculous at the same time. Also the costuming was so beige and unflattering. If you can make Rachel McAdams look frumpy then something has gone seriously awry. So many great things could have be done with the aesthetic but it just looked and felt like some cheap, cheesy period action film.

2. Whip It
This film, while slightly more entertaining than Sherlock Holmes, grabs the second top spot because of the wasted potential and half-baked ideas. I could rant for ever so long about the lame attempts at sub-cultural references, but I already have in an earlier post and no one needs to hear me wank on about that again. I said this at the time and I think it still holds true - if Drew Barrymore never again directs a film in her life, I am so ok with that.

1. Wolverine – X-Men Origins
So bad. So so so so bad. You know it's bad. I don't need to tell you. Everyone who liked this movie is to blame for the crappiness of Hollywood. They have no taste. They have no imagination. They are barely human. So bad!
Also - cartoon claws. 'nuff said.


I'll probably try and get a few more lists up before tomorrow night happens and they become completely irrelevant.